You ARE Who You Hang With     

By Linda Rendleman, M.S.

I read once that you are the average of the people you hang around. Are you networking at business women events with people whom you admire?  If you hang out with people who are unmotivated, are complainers, look for problems rather than solutions and are talkers not doers, you're putting big barriers up toward reaching your goals. 

Take a look at the people you spend time with. What business women are you connected with that you admire? Are they like-minded?  Do they have similar values?  Are they working on their personal and professional strategies for success?  Are you?  If you're feeling stuck in your own story and frustrated with your life and career, part of your problem could be who you hang out with!

Get yourself with a group of winners.  We're pleasers and nurturers and we know that we want others to feel accepted and loved.  Hey, we can do that for our children, our families and for the greater good.  But for achieving our goals, we need like-minded people.  We need people who can push us along, make us take notice of where we are at and determine where we want to be.  You have to get with like-minded folk who look for solutions rather than problems.  You must be with people who support your dreams and ambitions, and help keep you to a standard of success.

And here's the exciting thing.  Youll notice that as you surround yourself with people who hold you accountable to a level of excellence and expectation, that other successful people will join you.  If you hold a standard to which you spend your time with, you'll only attract more of the same.   Like attracts like.   

So how do you get started?  Here's 5 little steps to get you going:

1.  Make a list of the top 7 people who you consider your core group of friends or colleagues.
2. Put a star next to the name/s of the ones who are focused on problems rather than solutions.  You know who they are&the ones who make you feel dragged down rather than lifted up.  The "poor me, I am a victim" types.
3. Start a plan TODAY to reduce the time you spend with these people and if at all possible, a way to work them out of your life.  Brainstorm little ways you can reduce and eventually eliminate time with him or her.  You might want to read our article on finding a mentor for tips.
4. Look at the other names on your list.  Who is left that is an example of the kind of person you want to be and be with.  Call them up right NOW! 
5. Finally, make a list of people you know that are solution finders and success seekers.   Find ways to get to know them better.

Now don't forget that hanging with people who are good for you, also means you are good for them.  The best relationships are the ones that give something to one another.  Encourage and support the people you want in your life by helping them reach their goals, too.

When you're a winner, you attract other winners.  Hanging with successful people gets you a long way toward being a success yourself.

Linda Rendleman is an author, speaker and coach and is  available to speak on this and other topics pertaining to business and professional women's professional and personal growth. You may contact her at linda@businesswomenconnect.com or linda@lindarendleman.com

Find out about her book Women Like Us:  Real Stories and Strategies for Living Your Best Life here