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Blog - Linda's Views

Are You a Commitment Junkie?

by Linda Rendleman, M.S.

We all do it. We all feel the pressure of being in lots of places at the same time. We all know what it's like to say "yes" when we really want to say "no".


We make promises. We wish we hadn't made promises. Sometimes we renege on those promises. But mostly we make the commitment, stick by the commitment and, whether we like it or not, perform on that promise.


Keeping a commitment or a promise is a major deposit and breaking one is a major withdrawal. Stephen Covey taught us that. Keeping our commitments to others puts us in good stead with our kids, our spouses, our parents, our employees, our boss and our buddies at the office.


And did you know that some say that every time we don't keep a commitment to our self, we eat away at our self-esteem, bit by bit. Really, how can we feel good about ourselves if we can't keep our promises?


Take a look at the promises and commitments youve made to others and yourself. Id be willing to bet that the list is pretty long. After all, we have so many who need us. So many places to be! Werent we raised pretty much on Mr. Frosts philosophy about those roads diverging? You know, the ones in the Yellow Wood? ...But I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep? Wouldn't it be cool to just chuck it all and take that other road, the one diverging and leading to who knows where?


I know there's not a woman or man reading this who doesn't know that weary feeling of too many commitments and not enough hours in the day.


Take a look at your commitments; take a look at the motivation behind them. Do you make some commitments to others for the wrong reasons? Maybe you say yes when you want to say no, but the desire to please gets in the way. Maybe you commit out of guilt, maybe you commit because you want to be liked. Maybe you simply commit because somewhere along the way you never really learned how to say NO!


And, of course, if were what I refer to as commitment junkies, then guess what, we probably don't keep precious time for commitments to ourselves. You know who you are!


So heres some practical advise. Take some time and think about the commitments you have made in the last week. Were your reasons for making them good for you and the other person? Did you feel resentful, put upon, guilty when you made these commitments?
What could you have done differently?

Share your comments below.

Linda Rendleman, M.S. is the author of Women Like Us: Real Stories and Strategies for Living Your Best Life.  She is an award winning speaker and author.  Linda Rendleman speaks to women across the country on issues for personal and professional growth.  She conducts workshops, teleseminars and keynote presentations.  Find out more at www.lindarendleman.com or call 317-694-3523.

 

Melissa
I'm a commitment junkie...up until this second..I committed 9 years to a man who has cheated and still is cheating on me! I commtted to having a child with him and since the day our son was born...he has cheated!!! We own our business together...another committment...........Will commit to spending the rest of my day sending out my resume! Any help ? High energy retail professional with National Company at high level...looking to return to a great company and COMMIT to a great job!!!
04/13/2009 01:11
Mary
Melissa, Commitment is a wonderful thing when you commit to a good life for yourself. Congratulations on your decision to take control of your life for yourself and your son. I hope many women see your determination and commitment through this blog. You can post your job requests on the BWC Forum and I will see if I have any connections. Good for you for enacting your power.
04/14/2009 08:15
Linda
Hi I just heard through a discussion group that I belong to the Compendium Software has sales positions. You might check it out.
04/15/2009 03:08
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